Hung on every word you said, and I ended up hanging myself.

I trusted you, with every ounce of my being.

Every world you said, was soaked in gold.

I took your every word...and I hung on.

I trusted you, with every beat of my heart.

&& I knew I shouldn't have given in so quickly,

Knowing you so little, I hung on your every word.

& it bit me in the ass.

I trusted you to be here.

I trusted you to be there.

I trusted your words.

I trusted your actions.

I trusted, when I shouldn't have given in.

Procrastination won't get me very far

So, I am reading this book called "The Dante Club" I just started it. It's for a book report for Senior English. It's not due until the 14th of January, it has to be in a powerpoint form... So, I am starting it early. It's winter break. Today, exactly seven days until Christmas. But, this project will determine if our class passes or fails. So I want to start early and get it done, that way I can make revisions and make it perfect... A+ worthy... B+ at the least. Guess I better get started.... Write soon...




Is anyone out there? Anyone reading?

December 18th, 2010 Long time since posting.

My apologies to those who actually read this blog. I have been so busy lately! With changes of internet services, and getting ready for college, and also having (had) a job... I've had little time to get online... I am now a senior in high school, finally. I am almost done. I am just now starting my winter vacation.

DONATE TO HELP CROHN'S DISEASE!

In your opinion, why do you think the unemployment rate is going up?

In your opinion, why do you think the unemployment rate is going up?

Answer here

Hey, sorry I have been busy with working. I work full time now pretty much will spam ASAP, would appreciate you to keep spamming

Hey, sorry I have been busy with working. I work full time now pretty much will spam ASAP, would appreciate you to keep spamming

Answer here

Join Me And Together We Can Save Animals!!

In 2009, in the state of Washington, there were 19 cases of animal cruelty.

6 of the 19 cases were neglect and abandonment.

3 of the 19 cases were shooting, another 3 of 19 were stabbing.

2 of 19 cases were fighting, and another 2 of 19 were vehicular.

1 of 19 were beating, another 1 of 19 couldn't be classified, and another 1 of 19 involved hoarding.

These were 19 REPORTED cases... what about the other hundreds that weren't?

This is something that happens everyday... To innocent animals, who cannot fight back. So, who is their savior? Who will save them? Join me and save the animals! Together, maybe we can reduce the amount of cases of animal cruelty in the world.

 First of all, we should BAN uthanizationing- where they put animals to sleep because no one will adopt them. There are so many animals out there, loving and beautiful. It breaks my heart and brings tears to my eyes to see these sweet inoccent animals be put to sleep, abused, and unwanted.

What kind of sick person, could look into the eyes of a creature like these animals and abandon them?

I saw a show today on the television... This little kitten was trying to get attention from it's owner... She picked the kitten up and tossed it down. The kitten, repeated to jump up on the table... spilt the ladies coffee. The lady picked her up and threw her out the door....the kitten cold and hungry meowed. The lady grabbed the kitten, stuffed it in a box, and drove away only to abandon it in the woods...I want to reach into the TV and strangle the b*tch. People disgust me. Have they no hearts? A poor innocent animal, just wanting love and attention...only to be thrown out into the cold. I couldn't watch this video. I have had 20 animals at one time, on a farm if you would call it that. I had to walk out of the room, and I broke down... thinking to myself, "This must be stopped"

How would you like it if we beat you up for wanting love? How would you like it if we did away with you because you were annoying? You wouldn't like it very much. Would you?

So why do they do it to animals?

^ This innocent kitten, soon to die from illness, abuse, and the dangers of city life... How can anyone walk away from this issue? I'll tell you how, THEY HAVE NO HEART.

As you can see, we are the only voices these animals have.

So please, join me together and we can and will make a difference!

Ah, Rock Bottom. We meet again.

Now...

 I am a pretty optimistic person, but lately... I feel as if I am hitting rock bottom once again. In one of my older posts, "It's Nights Like These I Truely Dispise" I explain a night of hell...but I'm laying here wondering, does the light ever shine through? I have yet to find out. So, if you wondering. Here's what is bothering me....

• School is completely draining me. CBA (Classroom Based Assessment), WASL (though they have changed the name of this), grades, graduation requirements.

• Grandmas surgery, seeing my grandma laying in the hospital bed...I can't imagine losing her. But thanks to the prayers of my friends, (thank you Kayla) she was release today and is doing well. It really scares you to death. Seeing the ones you love in that condition. It's a slap in the face that nothing lasts forever, and people can be taken away from us at any minute. Also made me think, "that could be me". With Crohn's disease, I could be hospitalized if I became terribly ill, or I could need surgery some day. It scares you. Life is fragile...

It's been a rough start of 2010, but I hope things will get better. I really do... because at this point, everything is going downhill.. & I don't see it coming back up anytime soon.

I guess I should keep my head up and be optimistic.

Please comment if you'd like.

Thank you for reading this, and God Bless.

You Never Realize How Much Questions Impact Our Communications..

So, for the past few days in class my friends and I have been playing a game. It's where we can't ask ANY questions, such as...

• What time is it?
• How are you doing?
• What did you say?
• What?

Or any question for that matter.

If we do a tally mark is added to the chart...

This annoyingly fun game sure does teach you how important questions are in our everyday life.

Another survey (:

Something of sentimental value to you:	I can think of a lot of things.
Someone you know who is nearly perfect:	My boyfriend, I swear he is the closest thing.
A situation that embarrassed you:	Ohhhh gosh, lmao.
A situation that made you laugh:	What doesn't make me laugh?
A time when you feared for your life:	When I was really sick, a few years ago.
Something that you hate:	School.
Something that you love to do on the weekends:	Spending time with the boyfriend :)
A place you go when you want to get away:	I go for a walk, wherever really.
What you do when you are angry:	Listen to music.
What you look like when you first wake up:	Check my phone.
How you tend to treat other people in general:	Treat people how you want to be treated, is what I live by.
How you feel about abortion:	I feel it should be the womans choice. For rape & illness situations, it should be available. But, for the girls who just go out there and decide to get pregnant. NO. It's a human life. Illness, both mother and baby could be in danger. But, there is a difference in that and STUPIDITY.
How you feel about homosexuality:	Love hath no boundaries.
Your belief system:	I belive in god, that's it.
Some of your morals:	I don't know dood, my life my choice. Ya dig?
Something you would never do, but you're still curious about it:	Nothing really.
Something of which you are afraid:	Failure.
A bad break up you went through:	Hmmmmmmmmm.
Something that greatly impacted you:	Life.
Your connection with your mom and dad:	Very much so
Your best friend:	I have many.
The type of music that you listen to:	Rock & Country.
What someone might find if they snooped on your computer:	Myspace. Formspring. Blogger.
What your first day of school this year was like:	Eh, same old same old.
A fieldtrip you remember from elementary school:	Museum.
Something you like to eat:	Food.
A book you loved:	The ones my mom & dad read to me when I was young.
A musician that you like:	I like many.
What you want out of life:	Success. Love. Fame.

Survey to pass boring school time.

Hey(: What's your name?	Faye (:
Coo babycakesXD What're you doing?	Sitting in the school library wasting  not so precious time! XD
Alright, ready to get personal?	Sure, why not ;)
Are you single or taken?	Taken bby & madly n love <3333333
Straight, bi, lesbian, gay?	Who cares what I am ;)
Significant other? (Boyfriend, girlfriend)	Thee boy is Jeremy <33333
What grade are you in?	Junior, class of 2011
If you could go back in time and change ONE thing, what would you change?	Uh, bleaching my hair so much to the point where it completely fried my hair. Bahaha.
Who was your first love?	Jeremy <3333
If not with them, do you still love them?	I am with them, and engaged to them.
Who do you like?	I love him <3333
Wha are your plans for the weekend?	Tolo :)
Who is your absolute bestest friend in the WHOLE world?	I can't say that I have ONE.
How do you imagine yourself & your life in 30 years?	Hopefully successful
If you could be with anyone ever, who would you be with?	Jeremy, forever and ever.
What would be your dream job?	Tattoo Artist.
What is your favorite food?	I will eat just about whatever.
Do you want to get married, have kids? etc..	Yessum.
How many siblings do you have?	Three.
What are their names?	Jeremy. Kelly. Jay.
What school do you go to?	East Valley High School.
What is your favorite class?	I don't so much have one anymore.
Do you play any sports?	Not anymore
Do you know anyone who'se pregnant?	Tons of people, lmao.
Do you know anyone who smokes weed?	Nearly everyone.
Do you smoke?	Gross, no.
What is your favorite color?	Pink <333
Isn't it annoying when people randomly touch you in your face?	Yeah, it is!
Who is one person you neverrrr get annoyed with?	I don't think there is one.
Do you wear make up?	I do.
If yes, what kind of foundation?	I don't know?
Bronzer? (Just trying to get some ideas:P)	Nope.
Is this getting boring?	Nope, but I hate school.
If yes, what would you rather be doing?	I'd rather be at home, or something.
Where is your favorite vacation spot?	Oregon.
Are you supposed to be doing anything else?	Nope, hahaha.
What time do you usually go to bed?	After midnight.
Do you like your mother or father more?	I love them both equally.
Are your parents still together?	Yessum.
If so, how long have they been married?	22yrs.
Do you want many short relationships or a few short ones?	I want one committed relationship.
Would you rather be the dumper or the dumpee?	Neither.
Have you ever been dumped?	Yeah.
How many boyfriends have you had before?	I don't know, I've only had ONE serious relationship, so <3333
How many people have you kissed?	I don't know, lol

Kiss & Tell, yeah baby it's survey time!

I've Kissed Somone:

[X] on the cheek.
[X] on the lips.
[X] on their hands or fingers.
[X] in my room.
[X] in their room.
[X] of the opposite sex.
[X] of the same sex
[X] a little younger than me.
[X] a little older than me.
[X] with black hair.
[X] with curly hair.
[X] blonde hair
[X] brown hair
[X] blonde hair and blue eyes.
[ ] with red hair
[X] with straight hair.
[] shorter than me.
[X] with a lip ring.
[X] who i truly love/loved.
[ ] who was drunk.
[ ] who was high.
[X] in the morning.
[X] right after waking up
[X] just before bed.
[X] late at night.
[ ] who I had just met.
[ ] who I really didn't want to kiss.
[ ] while i was going out with some else.
[X] on a bed.
[ ] in a graveyard.
[X] at school.
[X] against a wall.
[X] at a show.
[X] at the beach.
[X] in a pool.
[X] who was/is a good friend.
[X] in the rain.
[ ] with an std.
[X] in the shower/tub
[X] in a car/taxi/bus.
[X] on a plane.
[X] in the movies.
[X] in a bathroom.
[X] in the dark.
[ ] on a roof top.
[X] under water.
[ ] while driving
[ ] a stranger
[ ] more than one person at once.
[X] and cried.
[X] goodbye forever.
[ ] when i was drunk.
[ ] who didn't speak english
[ ] with an accent.

It's Nights Like These I Truely Dispise

So, I've had a pretty shitty day today, even though it's 12:07 a.m making it Wednesday. I woke up Tuesday (today/yesterday) with a horrible pain in my stomach, of course. I know what it is from. It's from my illness, I am going through a flare up. It was rather bad, I didn't even have the strength to stay at school, so I left right at the start of third period. I've suffered a splitting headache all day, and it was really starting to worry me. Not to mention, my stomach is really screwing me up with it's pain. My breathing is off, and I am just overall weak, and I haven't even eaten. I can't, I look at food and it makes me disgusted. I hate feeling this way. Not to mention, I have a slight fever of 99.4, it's pretty normal for most, but in flare-ups I really have to monitor my temperatures, anything higher than a 101 means hospital for me. So, here I am at 12:13 am, feeling completely hopeless and alone. I have one misunderstanding in a conversation and it ends in a big fight and me in tears and a conflict unresolved. I tried to eat today, to keep myself as healthy as possible... But, the few bites I could get in made me sick just thinking of food, so it all got given to my German Shep-boxer and my blacklab, the little Yorkies couldn't handle a lot of food. I hate not being able to eat when I am sick. The last time this happened I lost 20lbs within 4 days, I couldn't eat, even to save my life. That was my downfall... &, now everything feels like it's going downhill from here... But, I guess like they say... "It can only go up from here" I sure hope so.

Haven't Written In A While.

Hello there :)

I haven't been on here in a while, so I thought I would throw some updates. My high school had a school dance this month, it was really fun! Tolo is March 20, and Prom is May 1st. I love dances!

The girls basketball team is going to State, which is pretty cool minus the fact that I have to play at their games because I am in band, lol. So, my boyfriend and I were online the other day, and we saw this guy who can sing amazingly! We both agreed we'd marry his vocal cords. I would recommend you check this man out!!

^ He  is amazing and he made my day! I hope you will listen to him! Spread him around! I want to get this guy noticed!

Condoms... & the many uses of them.

A rather pretty dress made of condoms... Seriously. Zoom in and look!

A shirt, made of condoms.

A really pretty colorful dress made of condoms!

A pretty cute hat. Wow, nice!

Yup, that's right... They make clothes out of these!!!

Basketball Games At My High School...

Basketball games at my high school, that sure is some crazy sh*t! I'm a bass clarinet player in our school band, and we have to play at the games. *oh joy* I hate basketball games, so boring. I always can't wait for football season to come around. But, it's these people who make the games worth going to. Anthony, Jessica, and Logan (All four of us play bass clarinet). Tyler and his brother Aaron (Tenor Sax and Trombone). Aaron (Trombone) Shane and Hilary (Clarinet). Rebecca (not in band) Chris and Victor (trombone) No doubt, these kids make the games enjoyable. We all range from Freshmen, Sophmores, Juniors, and Seniors, and the already graduated. Anthony, Tyler, his brother Aaron, and myself can all be caught singing retardly to the school fight song, dancing gayly, and screaming random words, profanity, and obscenly odd-off-the-wall comments to distract other players. Words such as, "Tuna Melt...Queef...Casserole...Fish..." I'm sure by now you get the point. Well, today we found a new way of entertainment. Using my new ipod nano with the built in video camera, with it comes many features and ways to record... Such as, mirror, bulge, kalidiskope, black and white, cyborg, security camera, sephia, and many more. We learned that with the mirror effect you can make yourself literally makeout with yourself... Weird, right? But, nevertheless, the funniest sh*t I have ever seen! Gotta love the good ol times at the high school basktball games.

My Amazing Friend Lyssa Made This Video For Me :)

Make sure you click on BOTH play buttons so you can hear the music along with the video.
THANKS! Comment and enjoy

The Strangest Things Happen On My Front Porch... Luckily, I caught this particular event on film...

This is Shawn, he came over one day... & this is what happens... God, this kid should be an actor.

January 25th, 2009

Looking back today, it's almost been a year since I met someone who really changed my life. I was a user of the website Tagged.com. I had just created a profile, and I was looking for others in my area. There was a boy who caught my eyes, my name also grabbed my attention. But, the thing I noticed first were the deep brown eyes looking back at me. I added this person, and started talking to them right away. Sadly, I ended up getting that account locked because of the stupid captchas. At that moment, I had to create a new account, and make sure I didn't screw it up. So, I did that very thing and immediatley found the boy I had been talking to. I explained what had happened and we went back to talking. Days went by, we talked and got to know each other a little more. One night, I had not been online, and I recieve a text message, telling me to get online because this person didn't have many mintues left on their phone. So, I did so... & later that night, we heard each others voices for the very first time in life. We talked for hours, I counted about six. The weekend came, and we arranged to see each other, we lived in two different areas. East Valley vs. West Valley. January 25th, 2009 on a Sunday, I made my way out to the Dairy Queen on 72nd in West Valley. This is where I met Jeremy. That day, it was love at first sight, love at first kiss, and love at first touch. I swear to God, he has got to be the one. I have never felt this way before about anyone else. Days turned to weeks, weeks turned into months, months have nearly become a year. I swear, this is the one person who has learned EVERY last thing about me, and hasn't judged me. The one who can put up with my stubborness, the one who knows me inside out and still can love me after everything we've been through. There is not a day that I don't have this man on my mind. I feel safe in his arms, I feel at home at his house. His parents are my parents. I love all of his family, and he is the same. My parents said he is the best boyfriend I have had, they love him dearly too. I love him, more than he will ever know. I had been blinded by false love in the past, but I swear on my life, he has to be the one. I don't know where I'd be without this man. He gives my heart the strength to beat, my lungs the power to breathe, and he gives me the power and will to go on each day, no matter what. We've hit our bumps in the roads, but no matter what we've stuck right by each others sides, and I can promise him it will always be this was. Jeremy is my hero, my best friend, my boyfriend, and the love of my life. I will marry this boy on January 25th 2011, and I will bust my ass to keep the smile on his face, because when he's sad, I am sad. When he's mad, I am mad too. I love him, more than anyone could EVER comprehend. Jeremy Blaine, you are the one, the only one for me. I love you, and 2009 has so far been the best year of my life, because that's when I met you. On Monday January 25, it's our one year anniversary, and the one year till I take his last name. These days, I will treasure forever. I love you, you have no idea how much, but I will never stop trying to show you. (:

My Thoughts & Opinons On...

My Thoughts and Opinions On...

• Religion;;

I am someone who has never had a religion. I am also a person who has never stepped foot into a church for any reason other than, a funeral ceremony, or a wedding ceremony. I have never felt the need to have a religion, nor to read a bible, or to spend my Sundays in a church. I will say it one time, and one time only. I AM NOT BASHING YOU NOR YOUR RELIGION. I DO NOT CARE WHAT RELIGION YOU ARE, OR WHAT YOUR OPINION IS ABOUT ME NOT GOING TO CHURCH. I AM JUST STATING THE THINGS THAT PEOPLE HAVE BEEN ASKING FOR QUITE SOME TIME NOW. I have many religous friends. Christians. Mormons. Catholics. I even have my Satanic friends, my Agnostic friends, and my friends who are open to just about ANYTHING. I myself, fully and entirely believe in God. I have always believed in God. If you don't, that's dandy for you. I'd also appreciate if you'd not bash my believes. It's just a waste of my time, and your time seeing as how I really don't care how you feel about the way I live my life. I don't feel that I should have to spend my Sunday in church listening to someone tell me how I should live my life. I also don't like listening to someone who will talk down-upon other people. Now, I also know that some of the biggest people in religion are the BIGGEST hypocrits I know. "I am a perfect person! I go to church every weekend. I pray every day and night. I read the bible... Blah.Blah.Blah." But, in some cases, what they don't tell us is, their usually out getting high, drinking, out stealing things, or just trying to not get caught by the cops for various things. I don't like the way they look down on certian things. In their words, "that is not the way God intended things to be". Premarital Sex. Drugs. Alcoholics. Alcohol in general. Criminals, by now I'm sure you get the point I'm trying to get at. I constantly hear, "If you have sex before you are married, it is a sin and you will go to hell." So tell me, if you actually happen to marry the person who you lose your virginity to, is this sin? Tell me. If God's intentions were for people to wait to be wed before they had sex and had children, why are there so many screwed up homes with deprived children who don't know who their father is, or are being raised on nothing but wellfare. If God's intentions were that drugs and alcohol were not to be allowed, why does the state sell them? They tell us that we all need to get along, we are God's children. Tell me, why do we have wars? Why are there natural disasters almost every year if not sooner. Why don't people get along like he wants us to? They say we are the ones who cause this. But, has anyone every thought maybe it's the hypocrits who start the problems? Just think about it, maybe you'll agree. Maybe you won't.

• Gay Marriage;;

I myself support gay marriages. Love is love. Who are we to make someone's life miserable. Sure, this is "not the way God intented things to be". Is anything anymore these days? Didn't God intend for everyone to love and be loved? Didn't he want happiness and peace on earth for us? I see no reason why two males, or two females should not have the right to be wed. I have many gay, bi, and lesbian friends. If they are happy, let them be happy. You've only got one life to live, live yours and let them live theirs. Do they bash you for being straight? No. So, tell me what gives you the right to bash them for being gay or lesbian. All people are different. Who cares. No one makes statements like, "Ha, you're uncool because you're straight", so why do we make comments like this, "Hey! Look at that faggot overthere!" Why? Straight. Gay. Lesbian. Bisexual. Trisexual. Pansexual. Who really cares, live your life. I say yes to Gay Marriage.

• People;;

I hate people, I really do. Mainly because people are hypocrits. I like how people can look you from head to toe, after just seeing you for the first time, and based on the way you dress, or the way you present yourself, they throw down names, "Prep. Goth. Emo. Slut. Whore. Loser. Jock. Poor. Rich. & sadly, these aren't the only names we say. Atleast get to know the person before you judge them. People aren't soup cans, don't label them. How would you feel if you were labeled on first impression? It also humors me how, some of the teenagers these days be some of the biggest two-faced people on this planet! Teenagers these days are so cruel. One minute you're friends, the next you are enemies. I don't like how, you can see a girl in a short skirt and high heels with a revealing shirt, and say "Slut." Maybe she's a model, atleast she is this confident to show off her body. This does not make her a Slut. Or, take the kids in the skinny jeans, chuck taylors, the band shirts, the shaggy colored hair and the piercings. "Emo. Goth. Freak." Do you happen to know their name? Intrests? No. We just look at the way someone looks and assume what and who they are. We look at those covered in tattoos, and we say "Gross. Nasty. Freak. Jobless." Look at the beauty and the time put into these tattoos. You didn't pay for them, they did. Tattoos are beautiful, it's just a way of being an individual. You don't like their tattoos, and maybe we don't like your naked skin. I really don't like people. I hate those people with no common sense, these are the people I can NOT stand. The kind of people who, "Look a red light! Let's run it!" or those "I got an F on my test, how could this happen?" When, they never even studied. Gee, we all wonder. Or, those who can't comprehend the obvious when it's right there in front of their face. You're on a busy street, the crosswalk says do not walk, but you're in a hurry. Hmm, what is the smartest choice? Wait, or run for your life and pray to God you don't get hit? Where is the common sense these days. I really hate stupid people, those with no common sense, disgust me. At my age, I'm pretty good with sorting out the wrong and right, the good and bad, and the mean and ugly. But, it humors me that I have more common sense than those decades older than myself. People who don't know how to drive, how could anyone give these idiots a license! The people who stand in the middle of the isles at stores and talk to their friends or family, and when you try to get by, they just stare at you like you're the stupid one. Jesus, where have all the smart people gone? Can we ship off the stupid people? Or the kids who do the stupidest things when they know the consequences and risks, but think "Oh, no it won't happen to me!" Then, it's too late when their hurt or in jail, or worse, DEAD. Would the world be a better place if we shipped off the idiots. People these days, they really p*ss me off! (:

• The World Today;;

I honestly think our world is screwed at this point in time. It's a sad cruel world these days. I'm usually a pretty optimistic person, however I don't honestly see the world getting any better, and that is really sad for me to say. WAR- I don't see us ever coming out of the war, to much damage has been done. I honestly don't think that even our newest president Obama can ever bring us out of this mess. I do have hope though, but my hope is slowly dying at this point. If people weren't so cruel and mean, maybe we'd all get along. If people could learn to get along and maybe atleast try to respect others, no matter how different we all are from each other, this could all end and the world could finally be at peace. I am not perfect though, I have my moments of being cruel, however I do know when enough is enough. ECONOMY- I am seventeen years old, and I have never had a job. I've searched just about everywhere. Hours are getting cut. People are getting laid off, and there are just not enough jobs out there anymore. Imployment rates are going down, as prices are going up and up. Graduation rates are lowering. The number of obese citizens is growing rapidly. Could these be due to laziness? The presentage of those on welfare is rising rapidly. The number of homeless individuals is increasing day-by-day. Is there anything we can do to stop this? Will we ever stop this? Can we fix this? Do we even care? These are answers that I can't answer alone. What do you think should be done about this? But I guess in order to change the world, we must first change ourselves. Change has got to start somewhere, right?

Jimmy "The Rev" Sullivan.

It's been quite sometime since I have been on here. I'm been busy with school and such. But, I thought now that I have the chance, I will share my thoughts about the death of the amazing and talented drummer on Avenged Sevenfold...

James Owen Sullivan.

The night I found out about his passing, my heart hit the floor. The world came crashing down, and my heart broke into pieces. Avenged Sevenfold had been my favorite band for quite sometime. Since about 2001 I would have to say, though I was rather young. Today, I am seveteen years old. I remember seeing them life. His stage presence, attitude, everything... I will never forget this man. It's much to hard to, he was a legend for sure. Seeing the hurt of the fans, it's no doubt this man was loved, more than he could ever comprehend. I hope that Avenged Sevenfold will continue in his memory, but if not, I will not blame them. It's very understandable at this point, it will be a long and hard journey. Avenged Sevenfold's music has helped me through a lot in life, and I will always know them as my favorite band, no matter what.

Farwell James Owen Sullivan, you are finally free.

Much to young to die, much to loved to be forgotten.

Rest In Peace.

Febuary 10 1981 -December 28 2009